shy

I don't know what it's like to be shy. 

I understand the apprehension of going somewhere new and what it feels like to be the only person in the room that didn't walk in with a friend. But I don't understand what it feels like to be truly shy. 

My daughter is shy. She is beautiful, talented and smart, but she is genuinely bashful. Many times throughout her life she has cried before getting out of the car when going somewhere new. She is on social media but almost never posts anything or checks to see what others have shared. Her most puzzling behavior is that she often blocks her friends in her phone when she feels they are texting her too much - she tells me she feels obligated to reply to texts and gets overwhelmed by some friends, so instead of asking them to stop or explaining that she doesn't text very much, she simply blocks them. Then her closest few friends call ME and ask ME to ask her questions and tell her things since they know they're on the BLOCKED list. I've explained that her closest friends love her enough to put up with this - but that not many other people will. 

As she's turned from a child to a teen I've learned that you're born this way. Shy people don't grow out of it and it isn't a phase. You can offer all the coaching and encouragement in the world but you can't MAKE them unshy - I've tried.

I'm thankful I have a shy child. I've learned many things from her:

1. When you're not talking you're listening.

2. When you're not listening you're not connecting with people.

3. She watches every move every person in a room makes and thinks about why they are doing what they are doing then analyzes what they do next.

4. She's a great judge of character.

With myself and my son being quite outgoing personalities, it can be nice to have someone keep the calm in our house. Spending time with her REQUIRES me to slow down, unplug and focus - which ensures quality time is spent. And for that, I am grateful.