We all know that, but we also know that it shapes people's lives in both good and bad ways.
Keeping those facts in mind - I wonder wich happens more?
I have lots of fears - maybe not so many FEARS, but several fears and dozens of "worries."
Some of my fears may seem silly or childish and some may be considered by sane adults as completly irrational.
But, hey - you can't argue with crazy.
What I really love is finding people who will admit what scares them and that they have the same silly fears I do.
I found a friend a few years ago, that after several cocktails, admited that they were scared of the dark, thunder/lightening and nuclear war. I was stunned. Those are 3 of my top 5 fears. The ones I have nightmares about. (Especially that last one.)
I HAD to know more.
"What do you mean you're afraid? I wouldn't think you were scared of anything!"
"What me?! Yeah!"
I remember how refreshing it was that they trusted me with something so personal thats considered childish to most. What if after admitting they were afraid of thunder/lightening I laughed at them? They took a risk in telling me - and I remember that as well.
I'll tell most people I'm afraid of the dark, but I haven't told many that nuclear war has fucked with my psyche since "Red Dawn" came out with Patrick Swaze (RIP) in 5th grade. Who lets their 5th grader watch that?! The teachers at Patton Elementary - thats who!
The one thing scarier to me than my flesh melting off my bones as the earth around me scorches or slowly starving to death as humanity turns on itself to survive is being open with the people that love and care about me.
I want to be open - really open. I do. It has to be an awesome feeling.
But I don't know how.
I just realized how to be open with myself... baby steps.
Yep, baby steps and patience.
Jesus - this is going to be hard.