I’m sitting in a black chair looking between my phone and a laptop screen with a blank document open.

The phone is lighting up with texts from someone whose feelings are hurt and they want me to do something about it – one or more of the following: explain, help, intervene, fix, empathize, listen, etc.

The laptop screen is begging me to wright about why I haven’t texted back.

I haven’t responded because I’m trying to decide how deeply I want to engage with them. And which, if any, actions I will take if/when I do. (Sometimes it’s better for everyone if I just don’t.)

This is a decision that requires pause because I have learned, over time, that what I want to do isn’t always what I should do, either for their benefit or my own. It’s about expectations, learning, guiding, listening, behavior patterns and boundaries – on both sides.

I’m at the part now where I think about their core wounds and emotional baggage and why their feelings are hurt in the first place. I think about my own as well, and my part in causing their current pain (if I have one).

I know that sounds like bullshit, but it’s not. It is exactly what I’m doing and what I’m thinking about at this very minute.

I have recently been reminded that I don't do social media like lots of other people.

I don't think my way is right or better - but I do think my way is less stressful.

I tweet, post pics, update my status and even blog when I want about what I want. For myself. 
Sometimes I get writers block and ask for ideas on what to write about here, but if I can't think of anything and I'm not feeling the suggestions I get I just don't write.  I don't get paid for this and although I often think of topics I want to expand upon here on the blog, I rarely have the time to sit down and do it.  I enjoy writing here, but life comes first. 

As for twitter and Instagram, I do those for myself, too. 
I can't imagine the stress of trying to be funny, clever or talented "enough" to hang with those who are actually funny, clever and talented. My goal is not to amass a huge following or get RT'ed or Faved or Liked, FF'ed or even star-banged (it's not as fun as it sounds, sadly.)

I figure if you're looking for me you'll find me. And if you like what you see you'll stay. If you really like what you see you'll interact. And if not, that's fine, too.